24 Hours in the life of an unconscious Female

Well, after much deliberation and travelling the World, mostly I might add within the confides of my own mind, I decided to put fingers to keyboard and share with you some thoughts and suggestions on how to slow down as the pace of life accelerates ever faster, so come with me and enjoy the ride... These events apply to nobody in particular and no animals were harmed in the process of writing this blog... Right, that's my disclaimer, now on with the show

T'is the 12th of December 2013...

Life is like a ten-speed bicycle, But most of us have gears we never use. People these days have one speed, and that is balls to the wall, flat out, not realizing that there are a multitude of gears which we can choose to live our lives within, yet we choose to live, both physically and emotionally on the red line, revving at full speed, never stopping to smell the flowers of life, and we wonder why our minds and bodies are frazzled with unhappiness, anxiety, depression and a host of stress related illnesses dominating Humanity today...From flat out to flat out on your back is a mere tip toe away if you continue to burn the candle at both ends and refuse to slow the fuck down.

The existence of mental and nervous degeneration among a growing class of people, especially in large cities, is an obvious phenomenon for all to see, and those that contest this are living in denial and no, that is not the river in Egypt fuck stick, … the mania for stimulants or prescription medicines increase exponentially  … Diseases of the mind are almost as numerous as the diseases of the body and growing by the day… This intellectual condition is characterized by a brain  now incapable of functioning in a healthy fashion… in a large measure due to the hurry and excitement of modern life. Is it any wonder this is all to much for the nervous system to bear? 


Below is a typical working day for a Woman in the corporate World ,from the moment the eyes are forced open by that most evil of contraptions, the alarm clock until she collapses in to bed again at the end of the day exhausted and worn out. See how many traits you can idealize and recognize within yourself and understand why it is  Humanity itself is on the verge of a nervous breakdown.:)

Ringgggggggggggggg, Ringgggggggggggggggg...Ringgggggggggggggggggggg....

''Fuck, it can't be that time already, I have just nodded off, surely, there must be a mistake?I literally climbed into bed 10 minutes ago, maybe i am still dreaming, pinch myself, nope, its real, but its still fucking dark and the birds are singing, I must have set the alarm wrong last night as I fell asleep with my i phone whilst simultaneously sending two whats app messages to the wrong people, an e mail to the boss, and a text message to my lover with two saucy photos... Oh fuck, let me check I did not send the text to the boss, the e mail to my lover and the whats app to my ex husband, especially those pictures!!''

 Phew, massive sigh of relief as you realize those special pictures were received by the intended recipient, but already your first shot of intense adrenaline has hit you like a run away train between the eyes, your stomach is in knots and your adrenal glands are shouting already. ''Oh come on, give me a fucking break here,you have been awake 2 mins I am trying to remain peaceful, and I worked my socks off all week for you already!''

Of course, you refuse to listen, and besides, who's the boss here? Exactly, you are and your endocrine system works for you, and they'd be wise to remember that fact, right!!!!You know why? ''because your mind fucking told you so, and you are your mind, your  thoughts, your memories, that is who you are, the boss''...(In fact, you are none of those things, but I will save that for another blog)...

It is indeed time to get up, and so it starts, the incessant mind chatter, like a firework display, shooting off in all directions, with colors and sounds filling your minds cavity to the brim with things you have to do, get done, finish in time, start, attend to,avoid, and you have not been awake for more than two mins... Rush to the bathroom for your morning ritual of soft lighting, and mentally thank the guy who invented the dimmer switch for being so kind as to provide favorable lighting and wonder why he was never awarded the Nobel prize for services to the female of the species...

 You squint into the mirror, convincing yourself that the new lines which have appeared under the eyes are merely a consequence of sleeping with your face scrunched up in the pillow, face down, but will watch them carefully and will add ''Dr feel-good's'' number to speed dial just in case they are aging lines and refuse to budge with that latest wonder cream you purchased with essence of fresh panther in it which cost an arm and a leg... This Dr is a genius, all your friends go to him and he can work miracles apparently. Who cares that most of them have faces pulled so tightly that they have to part their hair to blow their noses when they get a cold, and appear to have been pulled through a wind tunnel testing center backwards, and would  look more at home in Madame Tussaud's wax museum, than in a boardroom, the lack of lines on the forehead and lifeless smiles around botox filled eyes, and the large out of proportion top lip are a small price to pay for that compliment from your boss you are desperately trying to impress or that stranger you could not give a fuck about that told you look in a bar last night you nothing like your 40 years and not a day older than 39 and a half... Definitely money well spent.

Continue with beauty regime whilst a continual stream of thoughts consume your every second, most based around physical acceptance,adulation and approval, and others which are work related, yet a complete and utter detachment from the joy of living and the involuntary but essential task of breathing is recognized. Matters not, Make up on, hair done, right, time for your double espresso to fire up the system(Adrenal glands sigh again, in vain, and accept its going to be another tough day at the office) and the one piece of brown toast with a scrambled egg awaits your aching stomach which has not been fed now for at least 2 days as you survive on a diet which would make an Ethiopian start sending e mails to Bono and Bob Geldof asking for help. 

Get out the laptop as the toaster performs its magic of turning white bread brown and set it down on kitchen table, must send e mails before you get to work, and quickly check face book to see that no pictures have appeared in your news feed that are uncomplimentary.( Make a mental note to self.(''Must set privacy settings to fort knox levels!'') EEeks, not liking that picture at all.. Quickly e mail, text, whats app, send a smoke signal,  a pigeon with note tied around foot and all other forms of communication to the culprit that has put a picture of you at the wrong angle on ''Fuck your life up book'' instructing them to remove immediately the offending article... Shake head and mutter under breath how violated you feel about this gesture, and vow to give strict instructions to everyone you know if they are to continue being your friend, never put pictures up unless strict permission is given, Don't they know that the World is watching, especially your boss...

Turn TV on quickly to catch up with current affairs on the news... Yep. Nothing has changed since last night. A cocktail of bad news greets you as the only thing grey-er than the news itself are the fucking robots who are paid to deliver it to you... Wars rage, economies on verge of collapse, famine and disease are on the increase, and a new terrorist called ''All-summer bin enlarging it ''has been found in a cave in Ibiza, off his tits and off his rocker, and represents the single largest threat that Humanity as ever known, so be prepared and accept that your taxes need to increase to fight this faceless enemy. You shake your head again, as a cascade of fear and worry consume you, stating, ''Something has to be done about this, its unacceptable'' Good job, you have just given the ego another shot of drama which it needs to sustain itself, but try to get a little angrier as to fill him up, so he will go lie down and be satisfied for a little longer... 

Egg and toast now ready, so you sit down, plate at side of lap top as you finger the keyboard with the right hand, e mailing the boss,  as the left hand skillfully cuts, scoops and delivers to your mouth a fork full of egg sat astride a small chunk of toast, but nooooo, disaster strikes, half the egg falls off the fork all over the key board. This can't be happening, surely, ''what I have I done to deserve this'' , you scream... Curse loudly and complain that you hate your life, your apartment, your work schedule, whilst wishing you were somewhere else in the Sunshine, but the truth is you do not, for your working title affords you the respect you need to be appreciated and recognized in a society which demands you behave and fit in to a socially accepted norm... (No internal conflict there ;)

The ego thanks you once again for that burst of anger and encourages you to keep going with this mindlessness as it enjoys the trauma and emotional disturbances which feed it.
Tut and moan internally that these period pains are just to much to deal with on a day that has started so badly and wonder why the big man in the clouds did not bless you with a 10 inch sausage and instead gave you ovaries and a underdeveloped penis to play with... Smile devilishly though that although society has not accepted sexual liberation for Women yet, you are every bit as crafty, tricky and  deceptive as your male counterpart and smile again that you have cheated on every one of your partners and never been caught... 

Congratulate yourself on this deceptive masterpiece, and pat yourself on the back, you are a master of deception and a mask wearing genius... Wonder if Karma may pay you a visit, and begin to worry for a brief second before discounting that thought out of hand, for Karma is an internal compass which tracks your moral behavior and only affects you if you are emotionally intelligent enough to realize that what you do hurts others, so nothing to worry about there. ;)

Close the egg splattered lap top, shove it in its bag, grab your keys, phones, hand bag, and head out the door, but before you do, stop briefly to shake your head, sigh, tut and berate the TV for delivering this tirade of negativity as the screen flashes images of body parts strewn across  a war torn terrain in far away lands...

 Perfect, another dose of drama to feel bad about, turn that square box of emotional persuasiveness off and head out the door and into the elevator where you look up and curse that fucking lighting for being so harsh and say to yourself that you would take the stairs if you did not live on the 32nd floor. Keep your back firmly against the mirror and don't dare to catch a glimpse of yourself, for fear of ruining a day not yet an hour old...Its still fucking dark as you attempt to answer the first call of the day, phone jammed between shoulder and ear as you try to open door of car with remote. Tell your flirtatious boss you will be in the office asap and that you have to go as you are now in the car...

 Imagine what the boss really thinks of you and wonder how you can increase your popularity within the work space to climb the social ladder as quick as possible. Complain its fucking freezing and once again state you would love to live in sunnier climes, but that statement is full of psychological reversal , as the truth is very much a conflict-ion of that false wish, but it feels good to add some more spice to the drama junky of a character which plagues your mind which is never happier than when its full of opposing wishes and desires, the perfect playground for created personas and  antiquated belief programs to cause untold damage to an already unstable organism...

Compound immediately the dissatisfaction with the weather with the fact you have been caught by a red light a mere 30 meters from your garage, ''Can the day get any worse?'' you verbalize, Well, yes, as you have chosen the wrong lane on the freeway and you are stuck behind a driver doing 10 kph under the maximum speed limit. Honk loudly on the horn showing your disgust and disapproval making hand gestures with both hands, palms up, suggesting you need something from the driver who is looking in the rear view mirror showing you the middle finger...

 Now you are really pissed as you slow down at another set of lights and you await the green light like Usain Bolt in the 100 meters Olympic final.
Another round of horn honking and hand gestures as the same car in front has failed to pull away like Michael Schumacher  from the lights, signalling your utter contempt at this selfish, unconscious individual who is going to make you at least a nano second late to the office... 

Wallow in increased misery as more and more drivers, some going to fast, others too slow, some cutting in front of you  add to your woes and emotional responses. Create an inner dialogue stating that this type of driving causes deaths and accidents and numerous ''what the hell is he/she doing'' must be repeated loud and often, which it is... Must keep the drama alive for as long as possible. Tutting, shaking of the head, heavy sighing, a few oh my Gods wont hurt either, all the time checking your watch, will contribute to a very unstable and unhappy mind set. Grab phone and text best friend how fucking selfish these drivers are and how you could have been killed 5 minutes ago because they were not paying attention..;) Oh the irony!!!!

Catch a momentary glimpse into your unconscious behavior and realize Earth is the insane asylum of the universe before stating that consciousness is that annoying time between naps, and serves only the new age nut jobs who have no real handle on life. You begin to talk with yourself, then disagree about the subject, get into a nasty row between your ears, lose argument as a another moment of clarity descends and refuse to speak to yourself for the rest of the day. This intent lasts 10 seconds at best as another driver forces you to break a little harder than acceptable to your fragile constitution and once again embrace the chaos, panic and disorder your life has become...

Finally, you arrive at work, nerves frazzled, sigh internally as you are not the first one into the office worrying that the boss and work mates will judge you for your tardiness. Make everyone aware of what happened on the way and feel better as strangely enough everybody you work with had exactly the same experience. (The lunatics really have taken over the asylum it would appear)Put that down to a remarkable coincidence, rather than realize the whole office is a sea of unconscious lemmings, totally immersed in their roles and trapped within chattering minds also, but it feels good to be part of it, so finally allow a smile and state ''Yes, this is home, This is where I belong and can really make a difference''

Walk past the ''OTHER'' Woman in the office getting a whiff of perfume, muttering under your breath, ''Nice perfume, but must you marinate in it!'' congratulate yourself on your wit and allow your eyes to light up with sheer delight as the coffee machine comes into a view. ''Should I be worried?'' your mind asks that instead of sweating these days you percolate and that Costa own the mortgage on your apartment? Of course not and convince yourself that coffee is the most important meal of the day and that you do not have a problem with coffee, but a major fucking issue without it...

Coffee in hand and now in your comfy chair, the calm before the storm. Just two minutes before the day starts with a bang, and talking of bangs, allow your mind to drift back to the amazing sex you had with your partner last night, but shift subtlety in your seat as your arse has not recovered from that savage beating it was given as you watched in the wardrobe mirror with delight. Smile and acknowledge that the sex with your guy was so fucking good last night that even the neighbors had a cigarette afterwards... Resist that pulsing between your legs, and move thoughts quickly away to more productive fare... 

Look around office for admiring glances as you are just one of two Women in a World full of men, and worry temporarily at the impure thoughts which most of the perverts are thinking, but then bask in the attention as your ego and fragile persona gets swept away on a tide of shallow emotions, knowing that you are indeed the office sweetheart and the object of many wanking sessions...

 ''Ummm, which one of my colleagues should I blow at the xmas office party?'' Major decision there to make?. No need to decide now, but keep that thought and discuss with friends at weekend who are experts at this and will guide you in your decision making...The idea of ''I will try not to get any Human resources on you'' takes on a whole new meaning here

It is at this point absolutely essential that you remain in this autonomous, robotic state of unconsciousness, and at no point must you stop and connect to your higher self, for that will diminish your ability to perform in line with left brain dominant linear thinking, and your flaky, right sided cranial twin only brings you troubles when it alerts you to the really important things in life, like giving and receiving love and living from within the Heart and that will  not serve you at all in a 6am till 6pm, 5 days a week mind numbing job...

Time for brainstorming and that important meeting which was arranged yesterday to arrange another meeting for tomorrow. Throw a few ideas into the ring, look around for confirmation and approval and smile inwardly, knowing you are making a difference, and what do you know, its lunchtime already. Better to skip lunch, so you can really enjoy the 2 bottles of wine washed down with a pizza when you get back later exhausted and your body no longer needs the carbohydrates for energy, another stroke of intellectual genius there of course, but calories from wine does not count after 10pm right?... Nope, lunch is for wimps, so reach for that coffee and enjoy that rush of adrenaline and catabolic hormones now rushing through your body, promoting more and more strain on the body whilst closing down the metabolism and converting all energy to fat for primary survival. Now you are really cooking, so bathe in this emotional state a while longer and savor it...

Just for the sake of internal conflict, berate once again your schedule, but quickly dismiss this foreign intruder that has jogged your consciousness and congratulate yourself for being an integral part of the corporate hamster wheel you now tread daily, and the pride in yourself, given to you now by those all around you including family, friends and your society itself, and look in the mirror and really believe in this identity which affords you worthiness lacking so badly before you landed your job title...

The day like most others then takes on its face of familiarity and you go about your business, dotting I's and crossing T's... check nails, eyes lashes, and face for any excessive wear and tear, and make a note to self what needs doing before that important road trip, girls night out, Office party, for you want to be looking your absolute best, just in case your soul mate happens to cross your path, but know that if he does, you have a self sabotaging program which will put pay to any lasting happiness or consciousness, which makes your ego and pain body salivate with anticipation of that oh so traumatic time to come. So really hone those skills for showing someone that you are capable of a loving relationship and when its time to really grow, just pull the carpet out from beneath the  feet of you both, and the drama that produces is a wonderful way to thank the ego, and the false personas you have created, who will be oh so grateful for the carnage unleashed. Pat yourself on the back for a fail proof plan for emotional trauma that will keep you sad and upset for a few months until its time to repeat for a lifetime if necessary the same old stale programs, which really make it impossible for you to ever be happy with anyone.

Right, its time to leave and back to the lonely four walls of home, without a love to greet you with a smile and a hug, for your lover in which you have dedicated yourself is now called ''Workplace'' and being the loyal type, there is not enough space in that head of yours to have two relationships, so the guy with the big heart and even bigger cock had to go. Well, at least you can be honest and loyal to something and the coffee machine will never ask you to call him at 3am to tell him where you are. Nope, you are far happier knowing that the occasional night out with like minded friends, guilt free is  a fair price to pay for being alone, unloved, yet free to express your misery and loneliness convincing yourself you are just not made for any relationships with depth and meaning, for to exist within this dynamic would make you far to vulnerable, so close that heart, run for the hills and then wonder in moments of conscious awareness, which are rare these days where that man who made you feel alive, yet scared the fuck out of you has gone...

 This will guarantee maximum confusion and maximum emotional stress which your pain body will worship at your knees for, so keep it up, you are doing a good job...Living from the heart of course is for losers and romantic fools, and you do not want to be associated with those weak characters, so man the fuck up and put behind you any type of empathetic response you may feel, for this will only weaken the egos's hold on you and we cannot have that can we!!!

Rejoice, it's that time again, where you can get up close and personal with the one relationship which you never doubt, and will never let you down, as its always there, never judges you and makes you oh so happy, well, at least for a few hours, that's right, fermented grapes, red or white, matters not, bottle in hand, head for the sofa, TV back on, large glass poured, settle back, huge first gulp to oil those wheels up. Immediately get immersed in the drama unfolding in front of you and begin once again the ritual of personal outrage at the state of this unfair World, even allow yourself a tear if necessary at the injustice and cruelty being rammed down your throat by this prostituted arm of the Illuminati, the media, but suddenly cheer up a little as you remember that the x factor is on...

 Switch channels just in time to catch Simon Cowell  completely de humanizing and belittling a fat, mid western farmers kid who was told by his parish priest he had the voice of an angel and was Americas next idol... Shake your head but inwardly admire and find attractive Cowells arrogance and cruelty and imagine what it would be like to be underneath him...

 Another big gulp of Vino collapso and begin to sink into the couch. Change channel again and marvel at the size of Kim Kardashians back door and chastise her decision to have a child out of wedlock with some black rapper who's name slips your memory as the wine begins to work its magic, but really engross yourself with this life and death situation arising between Kim and her younger sister of which plastic surgeon to use for an eye lift. This reminds you immediately of the lines you noticed this morning, so jump up and head for bathroom mirror, this time lights fully on as you brave the truth in front of you... Horror of all horrors, those new lines have not gone and are not the result of a poor sleeping position...

 Curse the amount of money you spent on that exotic jungle cream as being fucking useless and decide there and then that you are making an appointment the first free moment you get tomorrow with Dr feel-good, as you have a trip coming up, and that extra line under your eyes will negate your ability to get laid or even appreciated by that tall dark handsome stranger, or even that fat, small, balding midget.. ( After 40, beggars cannot be choosers society has convinced you and must take whats on offer.)

Swear, get sad, and once again wonder why the person who loved you not for your looks had disappeared from your life? Drown sorrows in the rest of the bottle before the bedtime ritual of beautifying ensues, this time with the lights barely on, squinting as not to get a clear view of the truth, a truth in your eyes, which your fragile ego has convinced you is true, and zero truth at all with the reality, which is you are a perfect loving soul , if you could only remain conscious long enough to realize...

 Not to worry, soon your profile will be uploaded onto match.com and a series of blind dates with desperados, weirdos, perverts, psychopaths and social misfits will be fulfilling your evenings with your best friends who swear they are having the time of their lives with these fucking weirdo's, so smile and look forward to that as this really is the future of love and contentment, and this reinforces your rights as a woman to become male esque and it guarantees you full control of your need for meaningless sex and above that a protective mechanism which pleases the commitment phobe within you perfectly...

Stagger, cross eyed to that lonely bed, attempt once again to set alarm as eyes are dropping faster than you underwear on a boat party, and attempt to get some sleep...Convince yourself you are happy and in complete control of your life and destiny and you do not want anybody loving you as that complicates life... 

Riiiiiiiingggggggggggggggg Riiiiiiiiiiiinggggggggggggggggg Ringgggggggggggggggggg.

''Fuck me, Nooooooooooooo, It can't be, this has to be a dream???'' Pinch yourself once again!!! Noooo, its  for real.... 5.30 am and time for your double espresso... 

And so it starts again.. Repeat for 5 to 6 days per week for best results and for fuck sake, do not weaken and allow your heart to speak with you... Stay in your head, anothers bed and outta love... You know it makes sense.

One more thing.''Its been emotional''
Johntomas666

True love, soul mates, and what Women want.

Well, it's been some time since I put fingers to key board and offended anyone through my at times cynical observations which made me plenty of admirers, but alas, caused others to construct miniature dolls of me, stick pins where the sun doesn't shine and walk anti clockwise around bonfires, chanting in Latin whilst declaring me to be the Anti-Christ in the attempt to infect me with some type of voodoo ailment which would cause my balls to shrivel and my prized manhood to whither and die...

Well, to be honest, my balls have been aching lately, but my sword of life is still capable of supporting a sodden beach towel at 90 degrees, especially first thing in the morning, which, if honest is more a product of Male bio mechanics and nature playing its part than my ability to ''Keep Wood'' as they say in the porn industry... Matters not, it's still a mighty impressive sight, if I say so myself!!!..

T'is the 12/12/12 which just had to be celebrated with a Johntomas666 rant... Welcome to my World once again,  from a Sunny Dubai, and this date will be honored by a blog which will contain I hope, many interesting as well as comical observations... Enjoy.

Any Man who has a modicum of intelligence will know very well that the male and female of the species are as different as well, Man and Woman, and those who don't are either in shitty, soon to be over relationships, or sat on their sofas with a box of Kleenex, pulling themselves inside out, whilst watching very badly dubbed Swedish Porn. and wondering why they just can't find someone that will make them happy and who understands them and their needs... Let me help you out here. First you need to understand what that most complex of entities wants and desires, that's right, the Woman!!!

1... What she does not want is a complete walk over, a wanker of the highest order and an embarrassment to mankind and any Woman who tells you that is not just fooling you, she is fooling herself, for what she has is a slave, and this my friend will end, very prematurely with an exit visa stamped on your fucking forehead whilst you run around like a headless chicken , in an emotional wreck crying into your green tea ''What did I do wrong, I gave that fucking bitch everything!''... Well, limp dick, you just answered your own question, ''You gave her everything, and yourself nothing!!!''when what she really wanted was for you to grow a set of balls and say..''listen, cut that shit out right now and start respecting me, or me and you will be falling out, got that!''And the one word that will gain you more respect than any other is ''NO!''  but say it with feeling and energy and fucking well mean it.!!! Now, that my friends would be a start in the right direction.

2...Equally, they want a strong guy, but not a macho-bullshit type of guy who every time you go out wants to impress you by threatening anyone who just happens to look up and catch your eye. These types have more insecurities than that lot described above, and are left equally as fast by a modern Woman, once of course she gets over the fear he is going to throw her off the balcony if she dare leave him, which some will manipulate the Woman into believing, and alas, there are many of these dysfunctional fucks ups who control their Girls through fear, and do not have an ounce of respect for those that they claim to love... This bunch of clowns would not know the meaning of the word L.O.V.E if it was rammed down their throats by the Dalai Lama himself...

3... What they do love however is Confidence and resourcefulness with clarity of purpose.
 What does this mean I hear you ask? well you must have direction. The ability to Figure things out. Finding your way in life. That doesn't mean you can’t make mistakes,of course you can, for that's what we do as Human beings, we make them by the bucket load, But when you make mistakes, you must learn from them and become stronger, always keeping your direction in mind and what it is you are trying to achieve from the relationship and pursuing those goals with emotional intelligence and the ability to truly understand what it is she is trying to tell you. You have to have goals and you have to go after them in an intelligent way. Most guys are scared shit less in their lives. Even the ones who pretend not to be, but that can be improved upon, and it comes from within, not from any external source, so focus on the qualities you inherently know you have and try to develop inner peace and calmness... I suggest you learn how to meditate to unscramble that busy mind which will fuck you up 10 ways from Sunday

4...Learn to understand who she is and what she truly wants from you.
When you communicate, listen and understand first before you respond to her. Care enough to see who she really is. Understand her heart and soul. If you don’t, she will build a wall of protection around her emotions so that she doesn't get hurt. This will alienate her. You've already lost the game at this point my friend unless you recognize the signs and remove that wall she is building faster than a negro slave can escape after walking into a KKK convention by mistake.

5... Now here is a tricky one as its based on many things, especially age...
Commitment..Fundamentally, most women want to give and receive love. You have to give her that opportunity..

For some Women, this is the holy grail of relationships and dream daily of a man who will provide for her the children her biological DNA craves, plus the protection and provisions afforded to her by a man of physical strength( good genes for breeding) plus monetary means to provide her with creature comforts, and of course to cloth, house and feed the offspring( Well, that is what she will tell you, but what she really means is, ''Fuck the offspring, bring me Cartier, La Perla, Manolo Blahniks and plenty of them'', and a whole raft of other designer houses you'd better become familiar with if you arrive upon a modern Woman who needs to get paid nigga!!!! I know, I got all South side L.A on your arses for a moment, but when the shoe fits, wear it Mutha F%$&(... ;)

So back to the issue at hand... Commitment.

If you’re looking to have some fun, this isn’t an issue. But if you’re looking for true love, then commitment is essential. That means no sexual escapades. You commit to being with one woman and to communicating openly with her. If you’re lucky, you may become soul-mates which takes me and us on to the next subject.

Soul mates, and what this means and how to recognize and nurture this most wonderful gift that nature has provided us with ,yet needs to be discovered. I find myself in a real dilemma here, writing in this semi serious style, because my readers, who are well aware of my spiritual beliefs, prefer to read my cynical  vitriolic diatribes at the unsuspecting, yet totally deserving of their character assassinations that I deliver,and I am battling not to turn this into a light hearted blog, full of comical metaphors and observations, but this topic is very dear to my heart and I truly feel there are so many men out there who are lost and have no clue about what women want, and as for the term soul mate, forget about it. The majority either think that's  a term to describe Afro Caribbean hair straightener, or a film about a Black dude who has the ''moves like Jagger''... They are of course..Soul Glow and Soul Man, but you see my point... LOST!!! Hence I will proceed trying my best not to go off road at a 45 degree angle and stay on track here with this very important message.

So, what is a soul mate, and how do we achieve that most glorious of unions.?

To get right to the essence, I believe that the key distinction to make is that when acting through the persona (the mask that we wear as we interact with other people) it is impossible to achieve true love, and that the only way to find a real soul mate is to get in touch with our own emotional selves and to express them to that other person and to drop the role playing that both genders are guilty of...

 You literally have to bare your soul, to each other, and no, I do not mean your arse holes, although I am completely comfortable with Anal play,so enjoy it,  but the real you, behind the masks of insecurity, and the mini movies that we create, usually influenced by a warped society that has indoctrinated into you a false set of beliefs, that you believe in so whole heartily that you actually uphold this false sense of self and the character you have created...

We are a gullible species, and so easily influenced. You just have to do the math... There are over 7 billion people on this planet and over half of them believe that there is a mythical man way up in the clouds judging all we say and do, with a list of 10 things he does not want us to do, and if we ignore him, there is a place where you will be sent, full of smoke and fire and disease, where you will burn and scream in pain and torment with anguish and terror, forever, yet...HE LOVES YOU!!! Get the fuck outta here with that shit.

So you see how we Humans are so easily manipulated into believing nonsense and fairy tales and its no wonder why we have lost our ability to be ourselves, but its essential if you want to achieve a successful, loving relationship...

You must be skillful in handling the insecurities that will arise from a changing female and to reassure her that she is still attractive, even when she is capable of hiding 10 pencils and pens under her boobs and her nipples are pointing south, or that they fall into her armpits when she lays down, and be sympathetic when she complains that her thighs bang and rub together when she walks, and to respect her wishes not to hold onto to or touch her stomach which hangs down when you are fucking her from behind, and to reassure her that those noises she makes from that very special place are normal when air gets trapped in certain positions and is very normal... ( I am trying my best to keep the humor out of this, but alas, failing miserably, so forgive the occasional humorous observation).. By the way, humor of course is essential to any meeting of souls, so I will retract that apology immediately and move on.

So, finding true love necessitates both people dropping their egos and baring their souls to each other. It couldn't be any other way. Relationships based on the ego-persona are false, and they have no basis in reality, the reality which we have to face and accept, and not the movie directors we all become when trying to impress...

So, let's have a look at what true love is not: For one thing, it is not a business relationship. It is not about money, job “status,” physicality, or anything else shallow. Finding a soul mate is not about going to some bar and picking up some woman or man you don’t know and taking them home and exchanging bodily fluids. True love is not about looking at another person and thinking about what you can get out of him or her. That is just plain vulgar, shallow, and will end in disaster, That is not the way to look at relationships or though, where I live in Dubai, Half of these shallow, money grabbing socialites would strongly contest that statement, if of course they understood the word contest, but with  2 syllables they are already lost. ;). No wonder so many people never find “their” soul mate!, Stop looking in the wrong direction and remove the ego if you really want to give yourself a chance of finding that ''Special one''


True love is not about sex either although when you find a partner that floats your boat, its truly wonderful,  It is about honest and direct communication between two people who respect each other and resonate together in an indescribable way.

It’s all about you wanting to give value to her or him. And not money-value, of course. Human value.Your time is the most unselfish and under valued commodity I know of.Its easy to lavish gifts and toys when you have the means necessary, but to give of yourself, I mean truly give yourself and time, without any constraints whatsoever is real giving and its a dying art my friends as the pace of life speeds up and we lose sight of whats truly important... TIME. Give it and truly focus on what she is saying with your whole body and not just one eye as the other one checks your watch. She will notice immediately, and will not take you seriously, and this is a major reason for the breakdowns in relationships... We just don't listen, or give our partners our whole attention.. Ignore this at your peril gentlemen!!!

I think that the people who don’t realize this basic truth never find what they’re looking for, because, in the end, they’re only looking to gratify themselves. Maybe they’ll find a stopgap “relationship” to fill the basic hole in their egos and to top up their low self-esteem. But if it’s not authentic, it will probably be in vain. It certainly won’t be true love.



 I think that the only way to find a soul mate is to be yourself, express yourself and go for it. So give yourself the opportunity for a real relationship to emerge.

It sounds romantic to say and to believe that true love will fall out of the sky and find us. But in reality, we have to do the things that will increase our chances of finding the people that we want in our lives. If we don’t go out searching, what can we expect to find? Nothing. So being yourselves and just going for it is all you can do to increase your chances of finding that ''one''

Now, is there another avenue? Yes, there is. You can go out there and “date,” buy a new car, play “the game,” and have a good time. But finding true love like this is not very likely, if you’re relying on tactics and external things. Like I said at the beginning, dropping the persona is essential to real communication and to being true soul mates...

Now a foot note to ponder...

It's Difficult for a Man to know exactly how to behave and what he needs to achieve when attempting to please a Woman... Modern Woman also has to shoulder and accept blame here for sending out confusing signals... I could have so easily written this blog in another vain ,with a different message altogether, based on  the information I receive from Women that I know, and listening to what they are saying...

Even for the fairer, more emotionally intelligent of the genders, more and more, Women are getting together and sharing war stories of how their man/men/boys/ are taking them home, or to a hotel and making them bray like an asthmatic donkey all night long as they are given Clitoral, G spot, A spot and deep spot Orgasms that make their bodies shake rattle and roll and how he just gives the best ''Head'' and the Women squeal with delight as they laugh and compete with each other comparing tales of lust, or disappointment that their lovers equipment works OK but was dealt a very bad hand in the measurement department, yet do not think to share the real important things like how their lovers and partners truly understand them and that the need for role playing has been removed from the equation... NOOOO, far to boring, and vitally important that your female friends know you are coming like Thomas the tank engine all night long... So you see, Girls, the mixed messages that are being received by the males is causing confusion, and you to must contribute to the gender war going on.You complain also that you can't find a man that knows and understands you as a woman, yet you are now bragging and acting and competing with the worst type of Man who stands in the pub, or the building site sharing intimate details of how he made this girl squirt all over his apartment, which we all know by now, never happened... That technique is known to but a few of us, and I keep that solely for my true love :)....

So Ladies, never forget, Men and Women are so very different, and if you truly want a real man, a modern man, then I suggest you also become a real Woman and stop attempting to cross the gender divide, acting like a Man, the same type that you girls sit around camp fires assassinating.. You can't have you cake and eat it to, well you can, but don't expect Mr Right to come your way any time soon.. Mr right now is the best you can expect if you want to think and act like a MAN...

Till the next time..its been emotional
Johntomass666

No Sex until you finish that road.

A recent news story from south America got me thinking, and to my regular readers with long memories, I have touched on the subject more than once, but would like to revisit this potential minefield, as its topical right now considering what has just happened in Columbia, where a number of Women denied to their husbands, boyfriends, and lovers, which in South America is likely to be one of the same, their conjugal rights..

Welcome to the crazy world of Johtomas.

T’is Saturday, 28/08/2011.

A small background introduction should be the order of the day before I expand on this topic in my own unique way.

The Colombian authorities agreed to comply with demands for road improvements - after hundreds of women went on a sex strike.

For 38 days, they denied their men sexual favors until a road that connects their small town to the rest of the country was paved. So let me get this right. These small town Gals decided en mass to keep their legs, mouths and every other available orifice firmly closed until their lazy coke snorting road worker husbands/boyfriends/lovers..(see above), put away their rolled up 1000 peso notes, wiped the coca away from over-sized moustaches, and reacquainted themselves with their trusty picks and shovels, and the interesting thing about it is..It fucking worked!!!

Now, I am not going to state categorically these measures could be successfully replicated the world over, but pussy power is not to be fucked with, excuse the pun, as its serious piece of real estate down there, and it holds the key to most things on this planet. But, and here lies the irony. Although this tactic worked in Columbia, and the Women got their wish, In North America I can’t see how this would work and here’s why.

American woman and pretty much all women are on a continuous sex strike from the moment the two year milestone of marriage passes, which is standard procedure for most married couples I believe, so it's very doubtful this kind of thing would ever work in New York, since American men have long ago grown immune to this tactic, and the reality is, they are fucking anything but their wives anyway, who are also giving it up to the tennis coaches, artists, gallery owners and the hunk at the local gym, so back at ya!!!

Perhaps, if married women actually started having sex with their husbands that would be the real shocker to change things in the world but I seriously doubt it.
But, that's also kinda doubtful anyway, since most American married woman, both North and South of the border have forgotten how to in the first place, as they are far to busy shopping or pampering themselves all fucking day, and the older they get, the more they pamper, with potions, creams, beauty treatments, witchcraft, etc. Even sacrificing small animals if it means a tighter skin and a firmer neck, which alas, always gives them away, unless you are Ann Robinson, or Sharon Osborne of course, who both look younger now than they did twenty years ago., But for every Sharon Osborne, there are a 100 old toads who are failing miserably to retain the philosophers stone of life, the elixir of youth, and for the majority, the show is over and should be grateful their husbands want to fuck them at all. I know ladies that men in their middle age are no better, well, the majority anyway and I actually concede that in fact, they are far inferior aesthetically than Women of the same age, who at least try and stay looking good and desirable.. Who for, is another debatable topic, but you can almost guarantee its not for the old man, who sits in his favourite chair, every evening after work, farting and dribbling as he falls asleep after a heavy pasta dish served up by the cheating wife, no, scrub that, the enslaved nanny, housemaid.

The withholding of sexual favours would certainly work if rolled out across the globe and sisters united in solidarity and decided as a collective to keep those legs firmly shut. The dynamic the world over works the same way and the interaction between all men and women of the world works the same way and this ploy really would be effective. I am talking, world peace, economic recovery, a real coming together (excuse that pun as well) Can you imagine our bent and corrupt politicians and world leaders who have mistresses in every port being denied their obligatory blow job every time they come to town unless they contributed in some way to ending poverty or famine. I would wager, if this were the case Africa would have an obesity problem within 2 years as sex crazed mad men with balls the size of avocados would be running around like headless chickens making sure Tanzania, Zambia, Ethiopia and all had a plethora of McDonalds, Burger Kings and even the good old colonel and his secret recipe on every street corner. That is how predictable the male of the species is, which in comparison, is polar to the complexities and sheer cunning of the female of the species..

Women love marriage for good reason, other than the security and a large payout for services rendered if she does decide to up sticks and leave It may start out with purity and love, but that quickly dissipates it would seem.
As any smart woman will tell you, sex is a weapon that is best used as a promise and provided sparingly..

A standard tactic of many women I know is to use sex to achieve their indulgences, and if they can ever get their indulgences without having to actually use the sex (merely promise it) then they are laughing all the way to their new handbag or shiny new 4x 4 Chelsea tractor without having to actually deliver ,although sex once a fortnight I hear is good for the skin, a Woman I know well told me recently. (Now that’s what I call real love and passion.lol).I know her husband too and he told me his wife is so cold sexually, when she turns on the heater in her car seat, her crotch steams up and that was being kind.

The truth is, a great majority of marriages have become sexless for a multitude of reasons which to be honest we are all brutally aware of, and more often than not the marriage is a sham, a fraud, which is kept alive for the purpose of the childrens happiness, or a society which demands, they stay within the confides of a loveless existence because the alternative of being a social outcast or a pariah is more painful for the fragile ego than the pain felt living with someone you cant bare to touch any longer which is so fucked up, it belies belief, and To my Friend In Australia, ( you know who you are) It took real guts and balls to take that step, but un like most who would rather stay within an unhappy marriage for the kids and everyone else aside from yourself, you realized it had to be done and could no longer live in denial and You are an amazing woman with compassion and empathy and everything is going to work out beautifully and once again you will be able to fly from the confides of that metaphorical cage which has no bars any longer.

I will leave you with a humorous story which has huge relevance to this blog and although funny , like any joke, it’s just the truth dressed up in a comical delivery system.. I could have written 1000’s of words with examples and comical quips left right and centre to highlight the sex as a weapon theme, but decided not to as i like to keep these blogs under 1500 words if possible...

A Woman come home one evening and finds her husband

making love to a very attractive young woman.

The wife was VERY upset!

'You are a disrespectful fucking arsehole’’ she cried.

'How dare you do this to me, your unfaithful wife;) and the mother of your children!

I'm leaving you. I want a divorce straight away and half of your wealth, although I met you skint.

To this he replied: 'Hang on just a minute, so at least I can tell you what happened.'

'Fine, go ahead', she sobbed, 'but they'll be the last words you'll ever say to me!'

So he began 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenceless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty.

She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on more weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments and loved them.

Since she needed a good clean up I suggested a shower and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away.

Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, which I bought,but don't wear because you say they are too tight which is true as you ate like a pig when you were pregnant and now you are to lazy to lose it.

I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste apparently and they are to degrading.

I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair just like them.'

He took a quick breath and continued: 'She was so grateful for my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said

''Please....do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?'

Y QUE MIS AMIGOS SON LA VERDAD

AS THEY SAY IN SOUTH AMERICA

MAY THE PALM BE WITH YOU

ONE FIST OR TWO??????

Let me start by clearly stating that this particular blog will be spattered with a few humorous metaphors which will make my loyal readers squeal with delight, but in the main, this is a blog which needs to be taken seriously, if freedom, liberties and any type of prosperous future is to be enjoyed, and for those who are now rolling their eyes and muttering into their low fat skinny mocha-chinos there is nothing that lil ol me can do about it, then we are royally screwed, as its this apathetic attitude which is the greatest weapon of the Globalists, and you may think that appearing in a socialite magazine in a designer frock is the pinnacle of one’s existence so you can enjoy the short lived envy or praise from your equally insular social group defines your identity, but my friends, that is just ancillary nonsense, and you'd better get with the programme fast, if you want your children to enjoy any type of freedom whatsoever, so if you do it for anyone, do it for their future, the next generation who deserve civil liberties and God given rights of freedom of choice and free speech..

T'is Thursday, The 24th of August

The information war continues unabated, and we need to use the platform they created for their own ends against them, which of course is the internet. Social networking sites have become the bane of the Illuminati's existence as the free sharing of info has contributed to a new age of awareness which they will attempt to close down in the very near future, and its of paramount importance this is never allowed to happen, which will be a fight in itself as the blind public are led to the slaughter so easily and willing, I fear for this medium of exchange, I really do..

The sheeple have now become farmyard fodder. We walk, bovinesque into the slaughter house voluntarily as the Puppeteers tell us, ''Don't go out there in the fields, free to roam, there are cows out there trained by Al Queda roaming around who will terrorize and blow your udders off, so in you go to the industrial meat grinder and everything will be alright, resistance is futile, and you will be assimilated into borged beings under our control, before you can say Obama is a terrorist.''... And the scary thing is, in you go to get mangled and all without any type of self evaluation or opposition of what's right in front of your fucking noses...

At the head of the table, or so it would appear to the unknowing masses sits the lyrical laureate, the bank and big corporation owned coconut/puppet,Osama Borat Hussein ( I think that's his name;). The same man who recently cracked jokes during his Shite house correspondents dinner and was lauded by his army of cyborg supporters who are on his payroll, whilst 48 million Americans are eating cold soup via food stamps and sleeping in doorway.

Barack Obama for the record is the worst president in American History and he CONTINUES to make a mockery of the American people and his presidency.( Well, the truth is, he has no fucking influence whatsoever on any type of proceedings, and is merely an employee of wall street). There was no mention of the American dollar hitting a all time low this past week or the unofficial unemployment close to 20% in his speech to the correspondents, nope, it was all fun and games and jokes for the pre selected fraudulent Puppet..

The sleight of hand trickery Osama uses to take the spotlight off of his horrible presidency, is making the out of work American’s realize that the once “American dream” is finally dead. Osama has spent two years in office doing absolutely nothing but giving empty speeches and travelling the world, tongue fucking foreign leaders back doughnuts in a futile attempt to prop up the modern day Roman empire, and we are all aware of what happened to those loin cloth wearing barbarians as Rome burned

You will never hear President Barack Hussein Obama AKA the new world order puppet, give a straight answer on why the gas prices are going through the roof or the economic collapse of the USA is now inevitable and irreconcilable

His popularity has now dived to an all time low, and this uncle Tom, chicken rice and pea eating bounty bar will be cast aside without remorse and replaced with god forbid Sarah, ‘’my IQ is below room temperature’’ Palin, or any other puppet in chief who will tow the line and deliver the agenda written in the shadows by the real power who use pre selected politicians to do their bidding and are never elected by the farcical democratic voting process.

(IF YOU ARE A BELIEVER IN THE SUPPOSED DEMOCRATIC VOTING PROCESS, I HAVE A LOVELY CONDO ON THE BEACH NEAR THE HELMAND PROVINCE FOR SALE.IF INTERESTED DROP ME A LINE)...

We have corrupt politicians and police forces running amok who have helped install this totalitarian fascist dictatorship which has been planned for centuries, that's right, centuries and the end game for these fuck wits is clearly in sight if we don't oppose it now.

My whole life I have had this scary intuition which forecasts upcoming events, both positive and negative, and let me tell you, my intuition is going crazy right now, and something huge, massive is going to happen.. I don't know what, but my spider senses are off the charts now and we are looking down the barrel of a very destructive weapon, and I do not spout this info freely to impress those that have not the insight to recognize pure evil, which has been literally invited into your living rooms by the way of slick snake oil salesmen who are employed solely to do the bidding of the wall street bankers and corporate America, but I do it for self preservation and for humanity who need to know this nefarious agenda before we are staring right into the eyes of an Orwellian nightmare we ourselves facilitated through our own ignorance and insulated lives.

Wake the fuck up and oppose this tyrannical regime or get used to taking it right in the back door, two fists at a time..

The lunatics have truly taken over the asylum, and the mad hatters are cackling like deranged hyenas as the cartoon cast below them run around like keystone cops who in turn chase the headless chickens, which are the sheeple, into passive submission. The United States epitomizes the sheer stupidity of mankind right now, as they are spoon fed complete fucking bullshit by the globalist owned media, and they eat that shit up like a fat fuck in an ice cream parlour.

The level of corruption is nothing less than staggering, and one has to only look at Libya for a beautiful example of doing a deal with the devil. In Reuters today, they admit that they have aided AL Qaeda operatives to attack Libyan government forces and to over throw Gaddafi.. These fucking US funded terrorists have openly admitted that yes, we have attacked and killed Americans, and we will do again, but first, we will take care of Mr Gaddafi for you.

Am I living in the fucking twilight zone here.. I know the Secret government agencies fund illegal wars and coup de tats through the illegal trade of narcotics. That's right, the CIA, NSA, MI5 among others, are the biggest drug dealers on this planet and the stupid fucking American public look to these spooks for redemption and saviour. I am sure if Obama told you that Charles Manson has started a baby and young child sitting service, you would be scribbling down the 800 number faster than Linford Christie making good his escape after wandering into a KKK convention by mistake.

How long are you going to put your faith in the suicide bankers, whose ethos is pure greed and corruption headed up by the deeply satanic anything but Federal reserve who are comparable to serial arsonists and are now asking congress for a box of matches and a tanker full or gasoline, and the fucking morons on the payroll on Capitol hill are asking.''Who do we make the cheque payable to!!''

We need to draw a line in the sand, right now and no longer accept being arse fucked by a small group of very disturbed megalomaniacs, whose sole intention is to depopulate this wonderful planet via a plethora of unsavoury vehicles, including a third world war, which will involve China, a eugenics movement via our food and water plus an attack on our children's health via vaccination programmes, and as a father myself who loves his daughter very much, this sickens me to my stomach..... This is your final wake up call.... Freedom or tyranny?? What’s it going to be?

MAY THE PALM BE WITH YOU